I got mail today! And not just any mail… every broke student’s dream mail.
Your eyes are not deceiving you– that says: one free tin of Fancy Feast Gourmet cat food, and a free $10.00 bag of Kitty Chow! I get to pick the flavour too!
I was a bit worried about starving to death within the next few days, but now I get to live off of premium tuna and salty fish flavoured cheerios for the next week. There’s a party my place, and I’ll bring the kibbles if you bring the bits!
Or maybe not. If we’re going to get technical about it, then I have to confess: the envelope was actually addressed to my roommate Babylegs, and it turns out she is a bit possessive of her mail. (side note: if it’s sad that the most exciting part of my day was opening my cat’s mail, don’t feel obligated to tell me.)
It looks like my Friskies Fiesta is going to have to be postponed.
But all cat jokes aside– (and trust me, I have a lot of them), free cat food is still free of cat food! Especially when your cat refuses to pay rent.
Translation: GETTING FREE STUFF ROCKS! And it’s actually a lot easier to do than you’d think.
In case you’re wondering how I managed to uncover this wealth of kitty-related freebies, there was an ad on the back of some random “Pet Life” magazine which I stole from the doctor’s office for a free care package for my “newborn kitten”. All I had to do was fill out a little questionnaire and pretend that my cat is about eight years younger than she is (I now understand why my mother made me bend my knees and act like a twelve year-old so I could order off the kids’ menu until Grade 10).
This leads me to a new blog segment I’d like to introduce: The Best Things in Life are Free: A Comprehensive Guide on How to Get Free Shit!
Tip #1: COUPON HUNTING
Coupons are everywhere if you look in the right places!
Here are a few examples of “right places”:
- Magazines and newspapers …and you don’t have to buy them. Steal ’em from your doctor’s office, pick them out of your neighbour’s recycling bin.
- Junk mail I used to throw out flyers and promotions, but junk mail can be a gold mine for freebies and heavily discounted greasy food. Free fries with the purchase of any large soft drink? Don’t mind if I do! Free cheesy bread with the purchase of any two topping pizza? Count me in!
- Online If you’re not googling “free stuff” or “coupons” at least once a day, you’re probably missing out on dollars upon dollars of swag every week! One of my favourite sites is: http://www.canadianfreestuff.com/ Current offers include: half priced bagel sandwiches at McD’s, and $3 off of polysporin. Now you can raise your cholesterol and tend to your cuts and burns at the same time…ON A BUDGET!
- Receipts Read the back of your receipts. At least 50% of the time, there’s some website you can visit or a survey you can fill out to receive free stuff on your next visit.
There’s no shame in free swag, so put on your coupon hunting hats, and go and get it tigers!
Coming soon: How to Get Free Shit: Part 2 a.k.a “The Complain Game”